Modes of address

I recently corresponded with a Quaker, and he began his letter to me with "Friend Bart...." I thought that was pretty cool. Not quite up to the coolness level of an Amish guy calling you "English", but still pretty cool.

I don't think I've received any correspondence addressing me as "Reverend", although if I officiate any more weddings I may have to insist on it.

I've given some occasional thought to joining the Civil Air Patrol. With my teaching experience & master's degree, I could join as an aerospace educator with the rank of Captain, then switch to the "do-nothing-but-pay-annual-dues" squadron. When I accumulate enough time in grade I could switch back to an active unit to get a promotion, then go back to the do-nothing squadron, repeating the process all the way up to the rank of Lieutenant Colonel. Then I could start my own fried chicken restaurant.

I occasionally get "Professor" at school, usually via e-mail. In class I'm just "Bart" or occasionally "Mister Bart" (I love black people!), which is fine with me. I generally don't have the energy to behave in an appropriately professorial manner, unless you count absentmindedness and a lack of interest in my students as professorial. In which case I'm Ivy League.

I don't think I've ever been addressed as "Judge" or "Your Honor", which is probably a good thing since I'm occasionally an Arbitrator, which is not a Judge. Although my best case scenario in an arbitration would be for someone to begin a sentence with "Your honor..." and I interrupt them with "Look, I'm not a judge, and this is not a trial. It's a hearing. And my word is law. But I'm still not a judge."

I think the coolest way I've ever been addressed is when I was corresponding with a guy in Japan. He called me "Bart-san." Now that was freaking sweet.

Check out the rest of my blog!