This band's publicist did not do his job

Mrs. Bart has been kind enough to pick up the Starbucks / iTunes "Pick of the Week" cards for me. Apparently Starbucks Corporate stopped shipping them to the one near my work. Go figure.

Most of the pictures on the cards fall into one of 3 categories:

-Straightforward picture of the singer / band
-Artsy picture of the singer / band that works
-Artsy picture of the singer / band that doesn't work

After getting hold of last week's card, I have decided to add a 4th category:

-Picture of the singer / band that was originally taken for a gay interest magazine

The band in question is Noah and the Whale. The picture in question:

 

Seriously,the first thing I thought when I saw this picture was that this band's publicist simply did not do his job. According to this picture, these guys are officially the gayest people on the planet. Gayer than people who are deliberately trying to appear gay. Even if the genre of this band is "Gay Porn Soundtrack", this picture should be far too gay for them.

I don't know if it's the gay outfits, or the gay facial expressions, or all the man-on-man touching, but this picture is so incredibly gay that it defies description.

Incidentally, their genre, per Wikipedia, is folk rock. If it was pop, or emo, or the aforementioned gay porn soundtrack, I would sort of get it, but still think the picture was over the top. But folk rock? Not buying it. I am officially ordering Noah and the Whale to switch to a gayer genre.

Unless these guys were coked out of their minds, they should have told their publicist / their label's publicist / their photographer / SOMEONE that, hey, even though we're way into dudes, we can't countenance this level of gayness being released to the general public.

It's like that supercollider in Europe that people are trying to shut down because it could create little black holes that eat up the planet. This picture is such ultra-dense gayness that it could create little pockets of gayness throughout the globe that end up (1) making certain cities, towns, and countries far more fabulous than they currently are, and (2) destroying human civilization.

Check out the rest of my blog!